Sebenarnye kalau ikut hati, aku mungkin, masih belum bersedia untuk second baby. Dgn keadaan kewangan kami.. Aku yg masih belum bekerja. I think, we should atleast have a stable income.
Both husband and me agreed that we maybe ready after Dhea is 5yrs old. Mom also shared the same opinion with us. She insisted that Dhea still need much more love and care from us both.. And not to mention from them. Since they lost a year (literally) when we were in UK. And thats what we thought too.. But, its totally a difference story for my persistence MIL.. She was always asking me when can i gv her 2nd cucu... My simple and valid (i guess) answer was, "belum ada rezeki" hihi..
Actually, when we were in UK, i thought of having Iucd inserted and plan for atleast another 3yrs for the next baby. The appointment was always been postponed, few times, after 2 papsmear, and bz with assignment blabla bla (including the lazy me) i could not get any family planning until i reach home to my beloved country, Malaysia.
Back in Malaysia,after couple of months, i started thinking of how pity Dhea when she had to play alone, even have us parent as her friends and always asked if she can go somewhere and meet her friend. When we were in any mall, Dhea call out to most of the children of her age as her friend. That knock me on my head so hard and make me think, that she need a friend, a companion of her age, a brother or a sister. When she sees everybody of her age have sibling, and are happy playing with their sibling. I found tears drop on my cheek. I think its about time.
Then, mom suddenly talking about how Allah give rezki to all that He wants. And when one had a child, their rizki will also increase, in term of income mostly. Allah would never leave us alone when we had more soul to feed. Mom also told me that, when she had all her child, each one of us bring a rise pay and grade increase even dad got promoted everytime. Even with the new adik from mak tiri, dad got his grade upgraded. This is all rizki from Allah.
So i told the same story to husband. He noted and did not say much about it. Maybe he is thinking.
Then around March or April this yr, Dhea suddenly start addressing her self as "kakak".. She want everybody to call her that way.. I thought that was a coincident..
Then when i suddenly delayed my period, and had my upt check after just 3 days of delayed, Alhamdulillah. Its double line...
Since i am more prepared this time compared to Dhea's.. We celebrated it with joy. I start my morning sickness and bla bla bla.. The journey begin....
And what ever moms and all says about rizki is true. Allah had given husband more peluang, of job interview, he went to many, many job interview.. Some offer a very good package but some not. But husband still looking for other opportunity. Maybe he is looking for the best possible job. Insyaallah, one day he'll manage to secure a better job that suit him well. I pray to Allah, may He shower our little family with His barakah, more rezki.. And abundance of love..
And to my husband, don't stop praying, keep looking for a better opportunity. Don't give up. Insyaallah. Soon, the rizki will be ours. The four of us..
To my one and only child (as currently) i hope that you will grow up as a protective, loving, caring big sister to your sibling.. Always be fair..and share your things with them sibling and love them unconditionally. You will always be the first love of mylife. Grow up as a solehah, be good to people, be kind, helps the poor, always sadakah.. And cherish ur life..
To my unborn baby (yet).. Grow up well in my womb, be healthy, eat more. But dont grow so big.. Not 4kg pls.. Hehehe.. Help mummy to achieve vbac. And i pray for the best of u.. We'll be meeting soon.. I love u..